tubspiders

Trickle-Down 101

During Finals Week, back in college, I got real sick. I think I had the flu or something. I don’t know what it was, but I felt awful. You know how those professors are, though. No excuses. I knew I would have to come in to take that test. I went in dutifully, and almost […]

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No ‘chute, pt. 2

The pilot in this scene said, “Well, if you don’t wear a ‘chute, I’m not wearing a ‘chute.” I’m upside down, hanging from the thing. Neither of us are wearing a ‘chute. Most everything, like I said, is rehearsed, but some things you can’t rehearse. About a month after we shot this, the pilot has […]

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Apparent Apparel Apparition

My brush with the supernatural came when I was staying at a hotel famous for being haunted. Everyone was talking about it, asking me if I’d seen anything, heard anything. I didn’t buy any of it. The day was uneventful and I felt justified in my skepticism. That night, the sudden slamming of a door […]

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Night People

At night, I would get people come and visit me in the bedroom. Only in the bedroom and they ranged from very young people, kids, to elderly who are crawling on their hands and knees toward the bedroom door to get out. In the beginning, I believed they were there. In other words, each time […]

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Chez Pee-Air

It was the end of the shift at the popular chain restaurant where I worked. Several of the servers were in the locker room getting ready to go home. The two employee restrooms were also located there. One of my co-workers had been waiting for the end of the shift to use the restroom and […]

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Et Tu, Caesar?

In restaurants, there is a job called food runner. That’s an additional hand to help bring out the food when it is hot and ready. At my restaurant, it’s me. In addition to bringing out the food, we ensure the guest has everything they need to enjoy their meal. On this day, I was bringing […]

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Jaws of Death

This is from an interview with legendary stuntperson, Dick Warlock. It was a round tank. Stephen Spielberg is over here, looking through a porthole. You got the cage here. You got the Bruce* facing this way. Over her, you got Whitey Crumb, who’s using one of these gadgets that you use to fly an airplane […]

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Universal (Monster) Healthcare

One of my classmates in nursing school was perpetually scrolling on her phone during class. She seemed to have an internal alarm that would tell her it was time to seem like she was paying attention. She would suddenly sit up straight, drag her finger down the textbook page and raise her hand. “Is it […]

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